Ok. So It’s been forever since I’ve written an actual post on here. I’ve been doing more organizing and info sharing with this blog lately, and who knows if it’s been helpful. But today, I want to go back to writing an actual thoughtful blog. If anyone looks at this anymore, I hope it provokes thoughts and reflections on where God fits in the picture of our relationship desires…
Even as young teenagers, we women often desire to be married in the future, and in the meantime, be in love. Of course, as I grew up, I knew in my heart that I only wanted to date ONE man, the man I would marry, whomever that may be…but I still wanted to date him then! When I graduated high school, I was ready baby! I wanted love badly.
Fortunately, I had an amazing network of people in my life, who inspired me in my relationship with God to always be passionate about Him first, and a husband later. As you’ve probably heard me say, I never stopped WANTING to be married, but I always (ALMOST always) wanted it to be in God’s timing…something that He was fully involved in, and that my relationship with Him would never stop. I didn’t know at the time that I would have to wait until I was 6 months shy of turning 30 to get married. I once joked with a group of girls that I was teaching about contentment, that “if I have to wait until I’m thirty to get married, then so be it! I’m going to live my single life with as much purpose as I want my married life to be!” Funny, God. Funny. 😉
My single life was soooo good, that when I actually started dating Andy seriously enough to know that we were likely going to be married, I actually kind of went through a little mourning for my single life, and for the plans I had been making for the next few years (with no expectation of Andy popping into my life). I’m so happy he did, because as happy as I was before, I’m even happier now. But that doesn’t mean that my married life is more fulfilling than my single life was. What it does mean is that my married life is absolutely so incredible BECAUSE my single life was so fulfilling, on purpose, and absolutely without regrets.
I’m going to a wedding tonight, and honestly, weddings are even more fun to go to when you’re married. When you’re single, it’s sometimes a struggle to not be jealous. As a married woman, I can fully enjoy the joy they’re experiencing, as I relive the joy of my own union to Andy. I guess this is why I’m thinking of this. My “New Year’s Revelation” this year is “New Wong.” Learn how to be a wife…not only any wife, but Andy’s wife. The other day I looked up three different versions of the same portion of scripture. Honestly, it’s the most inspiring passage for me, regarding my former purpose (and perhaps your current one) as a single woman, and my current one as a wife. The duties are different. The freedoms are different. The purpose is the same: fulfill the LORD’S purpose, whatever your station in life. At the risk of being long…I’m going to share two of these versions with you. I have more to write on this topic, but for tonight, I’ll just leave with the Word.
“I want you to live as free of complications as possible. When you’re unmarried, you’re free to concentrate on simply pleasing the Master. Marriage involves you in all the nuts and bolts of domestic life and in wanting to please your spouse, leading to so many more demands on your attention. The time and energy that married people spend on caring for and nurturing each other, the unmarried can spend in becoming whole and holy instruments of God. I’m trying to be helpful and make it as easy as possible for you, not make things harder. All I want is for you to be able to develop a way of life in which you can spend plenty of time together with the Master without a lot of distractions.” ~ I Corinthians 7:32-35, The Message
“In all you do, I want you to be free from worry. An unmarried man can spend his time doing the Lord’s work and thinking how to please him. But a married man can’t do that as well; he has to think about his earthly responsibilities and how to please his wife. His interests are divided. It is the same with a girl who marries. She faces the same problem. A girl who is not married is anxious to please the Lord in all she is and does. But a married woman must consider other things such as housekeeping and the likes and dislikes of her husband. I am saying this to help you, not to try to keep you from marrying. I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few other things as possible to distract your attention from Him.” ~I Corinthians 7:32-35, The Living Bible